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my whole heart

20 Feb

160220Happy are those whose way is blameless, who walk in the law of the LORD.  Happy are those who keep his decrees, who seek him with their whole heart, who also do no wrong, but walk in his ways. You have commanded your precepts to be kept diligently. O that my ways may be steadfast in keeping your statutes! Then I shall not be put to shame, having my eyes fixed on all your commandments. I will praise you with an upright heart, when I learn your righteous ordinances. I will observe your statutes; do not utterly forsake me. How can young people keep their way pure? By guarding it according to your word. With my whole heart I seek you; do not let me stray from your commandments. I treasure your word in my heart, so that I may not sin against you. Blessed are you, O LORD; teach me your statutes. With my lips I declare all the ordinances of your mouth. I delight in the way of your decrees as much as in all riches.  I will meditate on your precepts, and fix my eyes on your ways. I will delight in your statutes; I will not forget your word. (Psalm 119:1-16, NRSV)

Happy are those who are blameless. Ok, I guess I’m not happy.

Who keep the Lord’s decrees. Well, I try, but I fall short sometimes, so I guess I’m still not happy.

Who do no wrong. Again I try to do no wrong, but fall very short. So again not happy.

Who seek after Him with their whole heart. I wish, I truly wish I could say this. And yes when I stop and pray and seek after the Lord and allow Him control, this happens. When my flesh takes over and the desires of my own will want to be had, then not so much.

But you see here is where I think this psalm (or these verses from this psalm) fall short. None of us are God and, therefore, are never single-minded or having our heart always be one place. We are torn by the flesh and the spirit. We are torn between Saint and Sinner.

So I pray that God will help me to be one who seeks Him with my whole heart all the time.

And I believe He will help me to do that, and He will pick me up when I fail.

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